little beast is sleepy yet also DTPF (down to play fetch)
So after seeing Beauty and the Beast 3D, can I just take a moment to discuss the un-tapped potential of post-movie ending shenanigans.
Prince Adam will be the most adorable obnoxious prince ever (also he is so handsome and dreamy UNPOPULAR OPINION WHATEVER I was swooning, do you not see that barrel chest and aquiline nose and OMG TOOTHY GRIN uuuuugh hot hot hot). I mean, he spent his developing life as a chimera beast. He had a hearty roar! HIS TEMPER WAS TERRIBLE. His eating habits took effort! He could jump banisters! Shit just doesn’t go away when he’s human, god damn. For the most part he’ll be doing his best to act like a proper gentleman but when he’s excited he’ll run up the stairs on all fours and when he’s in a mood (which let’s be honest will be 99.99999% of the time I mean we all saw the same movie right) he’ll have horrible posture and pouting and growling with great gusto. Even if he technically can’t do that anymore.
Also whoever is of the opinion that Belle gave up her life to be married (i.e. her dreams of travel, adventure, and seeing more!!!) can just go jump off something humongous because, uh, hello she married a prince who gave her an entire library wing as a starter. This is the woman that saved his life and that he adores beyond belief!!! THEY WILL GO TRAVELLING EVERYWHERE. omg can you imagine the tourism antics. They visit Italy! Belle is beside herself at the BEAUTY EVERYWHERE OMG and Adam meanwhile is trying not to get into the third fight that day.
Also did you see how they kissed
THEY ARE ALL OVER EACH OTHER LOOK AT HOW THEY HAVE BEEN WANTING TO LUST OVER EACH OTHER THIS ENTIRE MOVIE but all the furry crap made it all awkward and now they’re like, HOT DAMN LET’S DO THIS ALL THE TIME.
They will be loud as hell and Chip will be asking very awkward questions as to why they are always fighting in their room.
brb drawing fanart
anyone else jumping on this fanart wagon because it can’t just be me
the Prince acting like an ill-mannered animal still learning how to use forks YES
#this is what i need #beauty and the beast #SHAKING HIMSELF DRY FROM THE RAIN AND THEN ROLLING AROUND IN THE CARPET #GROWLING AT STRANGERS #SNIFFING EVERYTHING #Belle has to calm him down by stroking his ears
Things I never thought about before but need more than air.
poupon i think you might like to look at this
I’m really embarrassed how right you are, GP.
FIXED THE SOURCE FOR YOU
Poupon never gets the credit for all the weird, funny shit she does on the internet. Please source this stuff next time! Google Image search will usually help.
Man it ain’t even bother me anymore but why did they…. ms paint over the eyes?
this is…probably way too dark on most monitors but here is a picture. I wanted to draw a big hairy thing hugging a glowy thing, I guess.
All you who follow Poupart instead of Poupon are in for a treat since I won’t bother posting the odious assdick of a tome I wrote about this movie. All of you who follow both… why are you doing that to yourself. Stop it.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand while I’m here and while it’s 1 AM so that this still sounds like a good idea…
(please excuse my lack of proofreading and revolutionary grammar. As I said, it is 1 AM and it seems like a good idea to have both)
Here are my thoughts
on yaoithe true villain of
THING THE FIRST
Jeeze, that sorceress in the beginning of the movie, huh? Who the hell curses an 11 year-old orphan, for refusing to use his house as an inn to a complete stranger? What’s more, she chooses a form for him that pretty much would ensure that any possible friends or intimates would stay the fuck away so that he’d remain emotionally stunted forever.
Certainly there were no beings to connect with amongst the cursed in the castle, since the difference between the classes was apparently insurmountable. You had two types of people living in the castle, the lone master and the cadre of servants and sycophants (i.e. everyone else). None of which were in the same age group as the newly beastized Prince, and all of which (this includes The Beast, too) were too aware of the class distinctions of the time to even consider companionship outside of their roles.
The rose, however, the rose was definitely the cruelest part. In a situation pretty much engineered to be impossible, it gave the dude hope that one day things will be different, but with each fallen petal the apparent inevitability of his fate becomes more absolute. What a masterful, evil troll. And people call Gaston the villain of the movie.
THING THE SECOND
A common critique of the movie is that it’s “message” is desperately out of date and harmful. But when people critique the movie, they almost always come from it from Belle’s perspective—as a prisoner of a jackass with a mercurial temper while the beast plays an antagonistic, shallow role. It seems read it as Beauty VS The Beast. And yeah, it’s easy to see the unhealthy legacy of the original message of the tale—that if you stay with a beastly man long enough and if you’re patient enough, he’ll become a prince. A lot of women faced that same fate, so having that bit of hope was very important—but at the same time it was as cruel as the rose was to the Beast. That platitude of ‘hang in there’ became hopelessly broken when more women found the power to leave unhealthy relationships when divorce became a less stigmatized, viable option. But both Belle and the Beast are a bit more complicated than that.
I tend to see it from the Beast’s, not Belle’s, perspective. This is mostly because I was an ugly, jello mold of a kid and Belle was, well, a belle. The lead animators even studied ballet dancers to give her that unconscious grace that screams “Disney princess”. And she was smart! Which just seemed unfair, since I was socialized to see “pretty” and “smart” on a linear continuum—you just can’t be both. Plus, she didn’t kowtow to that Beast when he was being mean, she was able to stand up, ignoring class difference and the fact that he was fucking huge. Belle is someone I could admire and be a little jealous of, but not someone I could identify with and even as a kid I knew she was definitely not someone I could ever become. Though the alienation due to nonconformity was something I thought I could understand, although I never was ostracized like her for something as inconsequential as liking books.
Since I’ve always identified with the Beast more, that’s the perspective from which I’ve come to evaluate the film. Instead of a story with an out of date, patriarchy reinforcing moral, I’ve always seen as a story about a boy whose social and emotional development was put into stasis at a very young age discovering what it means to be a person, and it’s about a strange girl finding a place in the world where she isn’t just “a beauty but a funny girl”, but just Belle. The movie is Beauty and the Beast, not just Beauty, despite what the Bellecentric merchandising and analysis would have you believe.
Also, Gaston. Nobody antagonists like Gaston, except the Sorceress (who does it so much better). What a guy.